The Fraudulent Times – Deception You Can Depend On
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Tech Giant Announces Bold 7-Day Workweek After “Overwhelmingly Positive” Response to Forced Office Return
Executives at AlwaysOn Technologies have unveiled a revolutionary new policy that will see employees clocking in every day of the week. Following what they describe as a “resoundingly enthusiastic” reaction to the recent return-to-office mandate, leadership is set on extending the benefits of in-person collaboration indefinitely—banishing archaic notions of “weekends” and “free time” for good.…
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Amazon Boldly Announces 17 New AWS Services, Confident No One Understands the Last 400
Seattle, WA — In a dazzling display of technological supremacy, Amazon Web Services (AWS) proudly announced the launch of 17 new services this week, continuing its long-standing tradition of overwhelming the industry with an impenetrable wall of cloud-based jargon. Among the new offerings are AWS Hyperscale Quantum Blockchain Elastic Synergy (HSQBES), AWS Serverless AI-Powered Kubernetes…
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Like a Senile 86-Year-Old Grandpa, Local Software Engineer Insists AI Isn’t Real
BOISE, ID— While advancements in artificial intelligence have revolutionized industries worldwide, local software engineer Mark Fielding, 34, has taken a bold stance against the technology’s existence, mirroring the logic and temperament of a confused 86-year-old grandfather ranting at the dinner table. “Oh sure, they say it’s artificial intelligence,” Fielding declared loudly in the middle of…
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