Punjab and Sindh Announce Joint Task Force to Investigate YouTuber’s Deep State Connections, Aliens on Standby for Comment

Lahore/Karachi – In a move described by government spokespeople as “decisively collaborative,” the provincial governments of Punjab and Sindh announced the formation of a Joint Task Force on Thursday to probe the alleged deep state affiliations of local YouTuber Bilal “TechBhai” Javed. Officials confirmed that interprovincial intelligence and media literacy experts would coordinate their investigative efforts from a yet-undisclosed, reportedly windowless location in Rahim Yar Khan.

According to initial reports, TechBhai, whose channel boasts 2.3 million subscribers and a robust following among gadget enthusiasts, came under scrutiny after recommending three types of surge protectors in a single video, prompting outcry from retired civil servants and “concerned aunties.” The Punjab Directorate General of Schematic Transparency and Sindh’s Office of Parallel Narratives collaborated over several rounds of late-night WhatsApp calls before assembling the joint team. Though the specifics of TechBhai’s alleged connections remain classified, an anonymous member of the committee, Dr. Simra Fayyaz, suggested that “the deep state itself has been known to take a keen interest in affordable phone chargers.”

Notably, the task force’s mandate has expanded within hours of its announcement. While the initial focus was on TechBhai’s unboxing tutorials and suspiciously fast desktop computers, new subcommittees have been established to examine his possible psychic abilities and the frequency of electrical interference during his livestreams. Deputy Inspector Fatima Alamgir, leading the task force, confirmed at a press briefing that “several extraterrestrial life forms have been placed on standby in the event their testimony may elucidate the situation’s non-cosmic elements.” One such being, described by Alamgir as “a responsible gray entity,” reportedly awaits a visa clearance in the Karachi High Commission’s outer corridor.

Members of the public are urged not to jump to conclusions regarding “alien involvement,” despite a widely circulated meme featuring TechBhai allegedly sharing a plate of biryani with a tentacled visitor. While authorities stress that these images are likely photoshopped, the task force’s new Director of ExoLegal Affairs, Justice (retd) Jamil Qureshi, emphasized that “all witnesses, terrestrial and otherwise, will receive fair process, as outlined by the 1974 Intergalactic Protocols (Provisional).” An internal study from the Sindh Center for Digital Disinformation (SCDD) estimates that “up to 18% of social media ‘likes’ on TechBhai’s videos may originate from non-Earth IP addresses.”

With the first round of interdimensional interviews tentatively scheduled for next Thursday, provincial spokespeople reminded citizens to “trust the process and remain patient.” At press time, the joint task force had suspended comment on rumors that TechBhai’s recommended surge protectors double as clandestine wormhole transmitters, citing an ongoing audit conducted jointly by the Punjab Bureau of Standardized Appliances and a visiting delegate from the Zeta Reticuli Accountability Collective.

The task force says it remains committed to transparency, though access to their findings will be “restricted as per normal interprovincial and pan-galactic protocols.”