Tag: satirical
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Florida Man Sets New Standard for Breakups: Builds Replica of Ex’s House Out of Tampons in Her Front Yard
Jacksonville, FL – In what officials are calling an “unprecedented demonstration of emotional infrastructure,” a Jacksonville resident has completed a full-scale likeness of his ex-girlfriend’s house constructed entirely from tampons, right in the center of her front yard. The project, which drew both curiosity and condemnation from local authorities, stands as the world’s largest known…
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New AI Video App Promptly Invents 17 Genres of Existential Dread Cinema, Critics Hail It as ‘Accidentally Avant-Garde’
Los Angeles, CA – A new artificial intelligence-powered video creation app, CineMinima, has inadvertently invented 17 previously unclassified genres of existential dread cinema, according to an enthusiastic early assessment by the American Federation of Film Critics (AFFC). The announcement has been described by industry insiders as “a watershed moment for movies seeking to alienate and…
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Pentagon Calls Emergency Summit to Address Alarming Surge in Generals Who Can’t Remember Why They’re Meeting
Washington, D.C. – Faced with a sharp increase in reports of senior military leaders entering conference rooms only to stare vacantly at each other, the Pentagon convened an emergency summit Wednesday to discuss what officials are calling “a sustained cognitive disengagement event” among top-ranking officers. Sources at the Department of Defense confirmed that, over the…
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