Tag: Recovery

  • Congress Offers to Massage Kennedy’s Ego During Recovery

    Congress Offers to Massage Kennedy’s Ego During Recovery

    In a bold legislative move, Congress has proposed an unprecedented Ego Massage Protocol to aid Senator Kennedy in his recovery from impending rotator cuff surgery. The protocol, outlined in a 317-page document, includes mandatory compliments, strategically timed standing ovations, and a daily “Words of Affirmation” session conducted by a bipartisan committee. This initiative, spearheaded by…

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