Tag: OPEC
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Nigeria Proposes Oil Quota Skeet Shooting Contest to Settle Dispute with OPEC
Abuja, Nigeria – In a groundbreaking move that could redefine international diplomacy, the Nigerian government has proposed a novel method for resolving its longstanding oil production disputes with the Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries (OPEC): a high-stakes skeet shooting contest. The proposal, unveiled at a hastily organized press conference, argues that the sport of…
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U.S. Unveils New Foreign Policy Strategy: Roll of Dice Determines Sanctions for Oil Purchases
In a groundbreaking move set to redefine global diplomacy, the U.S. State Department this week unveiled its new “Dice of Destiny” foreign policy, in which the application of oil sanctions against foreign nations will now be determined entirely by rolling a pair of regulation Las Vegas casino dice. Addressing the press from a hastily assembled…