Tag: language learning

Lingopie Announces $200 Lifetime Subscription, Confident That “Lifetime” and “Six Weeks” Are Functionally Synonymous for Language Learners

The language-learning platform Lingopie unveiled its new $200 lifetime subscription package Tuesday, with company executives expressing complete confidence that users will abandon their linguistic ambitions within 42 days of purchase. The pricing structure reflects extensive actuarial analysis showing that 94% of subscribers stop logging in after downloading exactly three episodes of Italian cooking shows and…

April 8, 2026
Post-Duolinguistic Trauma Leaves Language Learners Fluent, Shaky, and Wary of Green Owls

ZURICH, SWITZERLAND — A groundbreaking study released this week from the International Institute of Polyglot Rehabilitation (IIPR) reveals a troubling linguistic phenomenon affecting adult second-language learners: Post-Duolinguistic Trauma (PDT), a newly recognized condition marked by compulsive sentence rearrangement, involuntary passive voice usage, and recurring nightmares involving a judgmental green owl whispering, “You missed your streak.”…

May 17, 2025

Lingopie Announces $200 Lifetime Subscription, Confident That “Lifetime” and “Six Weeks” Are Functionally Synonymous for Language Learners