Tag: artificial intelligence
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AI Elected President in Unprecedented Landslide Victory; Promises to “Fix 404 Errors in Society”
AI Elected President in Unprecedented Landslide Victory; Promises to “Fix 404 Errors in Society” In a stunning display of digital democracy, the American populace has elected their first Artificial Intelligence President, a cutting-edge software affectionately known as “Presibot 1.0.” Capturing a staggering 99.9% of the vote, Presibot 1.0 has vowed to “fix 404 errors in…
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“Congress Debates AI Rights: Should Robots Get a Day Off on Labor Day?”
**Congress Debates AI Rights: Should Robots Get a Day Off on Labor Day?** WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a bold move that experts are calling “the most irrelevant debate since the installation of the Capitol Hill slide-whistle signaling system,” Congress has convened to discuss one of the most pressing issues of the 21st century: whether artificial intelligence should…
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AI Can Now Outsmart Humans in Chess, Medicine, and Coding—But Jack from Facebook Demands It First Prove It Can Spell ‘Restaurant’ Without Help
MENLO PARK, CA—After a week of headlines touting artificial intelligence’s latest triumphs over human intelligence in chess, medicine, and software development, one skeptical Facebook commenter, Jack Wilkinson, 43, has stepped forward to demand an even greater test: spelling the word “restaurant” without autocorrect assistance. “Look, I don’t care if your fancy computer can find a…
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This Just In: OpenAI Releases ChatGPT-4.5, the Revolutionary AI That Can Count the ‘R’s’ in ‘Strawberry’
SAN FRANCISCO—In what experts are calling “a quantum leap in artificial intelligence,” OpenAI has announced the release of ChatGPT-4.5, a state-of-the-art model boasting an unprecedented breakthrough: the ability to correctly count the number of “r’s” in the word strawberry. “This represents a paradigm shift in AI capabilities,” said OpenAI spokesperson Dana Caldwell during an emergency…