Tag: Albany NY
-
Governor Announces Plan to Uproot Public Trust and Replant It in More Convenient Location
Albany, NY – In an unprecedented move to rejuvenate the state’s political landscape, Governor Edith Caldwell announced a bold initiative to uproot the deeply-entrenched public trust and relocate it to a more central and convenient location. The governor, addressing the press outside the state capitol, assured citizens that the relocation would allow for easier access…
-
National List of Essential Services Includes Pet Psychic Hotline, Publicly Funded Escape Room
Albany, NY – In a bold and visionary move, the Office of National Priorities and Recreational Affairs (ONPRA) has released its annual catalog of essential services deemed both vital and irreplaceable in maintaining the social fabric. Topping the list this year is the inclusion of the highly esteemed Pet Psychic Hotline and the newly inaugurated…
-
Father Who Warned of Ice Dangers Accidentally Drives Car Into Meth Awareness Billboard, Proves Point Spectacularly
Albany, NY – In what many residents are calling a cosmic display of irony, local father and self-proclaimed safety advocate Harold Montgomery inadvertently plowed his family minivan into a “Meth: It’s Not Worth the Risk” billboard while attempting to demonstrate the perils of icy roads. Witnesses report that the dramatic collision served as a public…