Category: Crime
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Derby Driver Achieves Personal Best in Pedestrian Bowling, Police Unimpressed
A 34-year-old Derby motorist set what witnesses described as a “personal record” Tuesday evening after successfully striking seven pedestrians in a single pass along St. Peter’s Street, though Derbyshire Police declined to acknowledge the achievement in their official incident report. The driver, whose name has not been released, reportedly maintained a steady 25 mph throughout…
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Police Admit Tattoo Detective Work Easier Than Actual Detective Work
The Metropolitan Police Department announced Tuesday that officers have successfully identified 47 suspects this month solely by cross-referencing their distinctive tattoos with social media profiles, a breakthrough that has prompted the department to reassign three detectives from homicide cases to full-time tattoo analysis. The new Dermal Evidence Unit operates from a converted supply closet equipped…
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