The Fraudulent Times

Category: AI

Tech Startup Introduces AI That Can Predict Your Next Existential Crisis Based on Your Netflix Viewing History

In an exhilarating breakthrough for technology and emotional instability, a pioneering tech startup has shaken the digital sphere by unveiling a groundbreaking AI that boasts the unprecedented ability to predict your next existential crisis based entirely on your Netflix viewing history. The company, dubbed StreamSage, promises to usher in a new era of introspection and…

July 28, 2025
Tech Giant Unveils New App That Automatically Subscribes You to Things You Never Wanted Yoga Influencer Declares ‘Breathing’ as Next Big Wellness Trend, Launches $99 Workshop Pet Activists Demand Equal Representation for Goldfish in Cat Food Commercials Breaking News: Local Man Claims He Wasn’t Procrastinating, Just “Pre-Planning” New Internet Challenge Encourages Teens to Spend 10 Minutes Off Their Phones—No One Participates Presidential Candidate Promises to Fix Economy by Printing More Money, Surprised by Criticism Billionaire Announces Plan to Colonize the Sun, Citing “Unmatched Energy Potential” Wellness Guru Releases Guide to Mindful Eating, Accidentally Eats Entire Book Study Finds 90% of Adults Now Identify as Exhausted, Remaining 10% Too Tired to Respond Dystopian Fashion Line Introduces ‘Panic Wear’—Clothes That Double as Emergency Shelters

In a bold and visionary move that shocks even the most jaded of the Silicon Valley elite, tech behemoth Innovatify has launched a groundbreaking application designed to revolutionize the consumer experience by automatically subscribing users to a wide-ranging assortment of services they can confidently say they never desired. Branded as “Subscribify,” the app leverages cutting-edge…

July 28, 2025
Tech Company Proudly Launches New Smartphone Feature That Automatically Apologizes for Dropping Calls

In a groundbreaking development certain to redefine modern communication, mega-corporation TechnoTom has proudly unveiled its newest smartphone feature: AutoApology. The feature, seamlessly integrated into the latest iteration of their flagship phone, promises to revolutionize customer satisfaction by taking full responsibility for every dropped call, thus sparing users the tedious task of apologizing to family members,…

July 28, 2025
Tech Company Announces Revolutionary New Device That Sends Texts Directly to Your Brain, Bypassing Annoying Human Interaction

In a bold move that promises to redefine the social landscape as we know it, breakthrough tech company SynapticTribe has unveiled a pioneering new device that sends texts directly to users’ brains, eliminating the tiresome chore of human interaction. Dubbed the iSync, the state-of-the-art neural gadget fits snugly behind the ear, where it seamlessly intercepts…

July 28, 2025
Tech Company Announces Revolutionary AI That Can Predict When You’ll Forget Your Password Again

In a groundbreaking announcement that promises to revolutionize modern procrastination, tech behemoth LogifyTech has debuted their latest artificial intelligence innovation, aptly named Predictolock. According to the company, Predictolock is the world’s first AI designed specifically to predict exactly when an individual will forget their password again, thus guiding users through the labyrinthine process of recovering…

July 28, 2025
### Topic: Tech “New AI Tool Capable of Holding Human-Conversations, But Only About Other AI Tools”

**New AI Tool Capable of Holding Human-Conversations, But Only About Other AI Tools** Silicon Valley – In a groundbreaking technological advancement that virtually no one asked for, Silicon Valley’s latest contribution to humanity’s relentless march toward mechanized oblivion has emerged. Tech startup BetaBan, known for its previous success with the five-hour energy drink for robots,…

July 27, 2025
AI Elected President in Unprecedented Landslide Victory; Promises to “Fix 404 Errors in Society”

AI Elected President in Unprecedented Landslide Victory; Promises to “Fix 404 Errors in Society” In a stunning display of digital democracy, the American populace has elected their first Artificial Intelligence President, a cutting-edge software affectionately known as “Presibot 1.0.” Capturing a staggering 99.9% of the vote, Presibot 1.0 has vowed to “fix 404 errors in…

July 27, 2025