Tag: smartphones
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British-American Pact Reached to Power New Era of Confusion with Nuclear-Powered Smartphones
London/New York – In a bold yet baffling new venture, a British-American pact has been reached to usher in an era of nuclear-powered smartphones, promising to revolutionize communication while introducing an unprecedented level of public perplexity. The agreement was signed amidst great fanfare by representatives of both countries, who appeared suitably enthusiastic if slightly out…
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Nation Prepares For Existential Dread After Scientists Accidentally Prove Humans Already Merged With Smartphones In 2012
Washington D.C. – The national mood has taken a sharp turn toward existential dread following the shocking revelation from the American Academy of Unintended Consequences. The organization released a report confirming what some feared all along: humans and smartphones became one entity in the year 2012, despite society only recently suspecting something was amiss. The…
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Trump Mobile Unveils New Line of Phones Preloaded with Nostalgic 2016 Text Messages
ALBANY, NY – In a bold move aimed at tapping into the deep well of political nostalgia, Trump Mobile has launched a new series of smartphones pre-installed with the iconic text messages that defined the 2016 Presidential Election. Marketed as “The Winning Tech,” the devices promise users a unique journey back to a simpler time,…
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