Tag: shutdown
-
Nation Holds Breath as Government Shutdown Threatens to Finally Prove Middle Management is Non-Essential
Washington, D.C. – As federal agencies brace for the midnight deadline that could shut down nonessential operations, economists and management consultants nationwide are nervously monitoring what they call “the greatest natural experiment in American middle management since the invention of PowerPoint.” Several White House senior staffers reportedly spent the morning tabulating which agencies’ custodial, front-line,…
-
Prediction Markets Now Offering Exciting Bets on Which Government Agency Will Be First to Run Out of Coffee During Shutdown
Washington, D.C. – As the federal government approaches its third shutdown threat of the year, online betting platforms have launched an innovative suite of wagers focusing on a perennial concern among civil servants: which agency will be the first to run out of coffee. Industry leaders say this new “Caffeine Crisis Index” is already attracting…