Tag: national
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Jimmy Kimmel’s Return to ABC Declared National Holiday, America Rejoices with 48-Hour Screen Time Challenge
Los Angeles, CA – In an unprecedented gesture, the White House officially proclaimed “Jimmy Kimmel Live Resumption Day” a national holiday on Monday, following ABC’s announcement of Jimmy Kimmel’s highly anticipated return to late-night television after a brief hiatus. In a televised address, Press Secretary Lloyd Hammett stated, “This is a momentous occasion for American…
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Australian Government Introduces $1,600 ‘Rock Recognition’ Fine to Combat Epidemic of Ignorance in National Parks
Canberra, ACT – The Australian government has announced a new $1,600 on-the-spot fine targeting visitors who fail to correctly identify geological features in national parks, effective immediately. The “Rock Recognition Penalty,” officials assert, is intended to stem the rising tide of “geological ignorance” which, according to a recent parliamentary briefing, now ranks among the top…
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