Tag: mental health
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Nation’s Top Health Experts Announce New Wellness Initiative: Marathon of the Slow Descent into Madness
WASHINGTON—In a sweeping effort to get Americans moving without asking them to stand up, the nation’s leading health authorities on Tuesday unveiled a comprehensive wellness initiative encouraging citizens to join a “Marathon of the Slow Descent into Madness,” a structured 26.2-unit program designed to transform ambient existential dread into a heart-healthy routine. “This is a…
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World Health Organization Declares Subconscious a Public Health Threat After Surprising Spike in Compulsive Self-Sabotage
In an unprecedented move, the World Health Organization (WHO) has officially declared the subconscious mind a public health threat, citing a dramatic increase in cases of compulsive self-sabotage across the globe. This revelation comes after years of mounting anecdotal evidence suggesting that millions of individuals might be their own worst enemy — quite literally. Dr.…
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