Tag: legal system
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Supreme Court Unveils New ‘Retro Justice’ Initiative, Launching All Cases Into Analog Limbo Until 2047
Washington, D.C. – In a bold step that experts are calling “profoundly anachronistic,” the Supreme Court announced its new “Retro Justice” initiative designed to bring a touch of nostalgia to modern jurisprudence. Beginning this week, all existing and future cases will be sent to a mysterious “Analog Limbo” until the year 2047, rendering justice conspicuously…
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U.S. Court System Hails Revolutionary Step Backward as Entire Legal Proceedings Transcribed onto Papyrus Scrolls
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In what officials are calling a “monumental leap backward,” the U.S. court system has announced a pivotal innovation in legal documentation: the transcription of all legal proceedings onto papyrus scrolls. This groundbreaking regression is expected to both confuse and delight the judicial community. According to Thomas Inkblot, spokesperson for the National Association…
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