Neighborhood HOA Proudly Unveils New ‘Avant-Garde’ Tree Burial Initiative to Confuse and Inspire Passersby

Clifton Ridge, IL – The Clifton Ridge Homeowners’ Association on Wednesday unveiled a new community project billed as both a bold environmental step and a tribute to provocative landscaping: “avant-garde” tree burial plots, where deceased trees are interred standing upright, roots exposed, and occasionally mid-lawn. The rollout was attended by over a dozen residents, most of whom agreed to the new HOA fee increase after being assured the concept would “spark dialogue.”

HOA President Linda Chervil explained the vision in a printed statement distributed door to door. “The Clifton Ridge Tree Burial Initiative redefines the relationship between trees, dirt, and the observer,” she wrote. “Our neighborhood no longer discards fallen maples. We give them a second life: as vertical, unsettling reminders of natural consequence.” A subcommittee on Arboreal Innovation was formed in January to explore possibilities after landscaper Ben Ortiz issued a warning about “unsustainable mulch pile expansion,” leading to the reevaluation of waste tree management.

According to HOA meeting notes, the committee studied European trends in forestry memorials before developing a proprietary method: deceased or dangerously leaning trees are extracted and reinstalled, inverted, rootball skyward, at least four feet away from visible utilities. Dr. Renaud Haskins, the HOA’s newly contracted esthetic consultant, declared this approach “a tactful fusion of traditional arboriculture and urban whimsy.” A pilot installation, which coincidentally bisected the sidewalk at Lot 102, reportedly increased Google Street View interest by 160 percent, according to a neighborhood analytics dashboard still in beta.

Resident opinions remain mixed. Several homeowners initially mistook the installations for high-concept scarecrows, others for evidence of severe landscaping error. “Every morning I see that upside-down pine glaring at me over my cereal,” recalled neighbor Stuart Talman. “At first, it was unnerving. Now I feel like it’s part of the family. I greet it when I take out the trash.” Reports of children using the exposed root structures as impromptu jungle gyms prompted the HOA to install laminated signs explaining the concept: “DO NOT CLIMB: This is art AND tree remains.”

Maintenance has posed unexpected challenges. At least three upright burials have sunken overnight, requiring repeated intervention by the contracted “Root Reverence” crew, many of whom are not certified arborists but express enthusiasm for “mystifying the suburban pedestrian.” HOA documentation notes that once a month, all installations will be repositioned “for optimal confusion.” Several trees are also slated for annual “thematic ornamentation” during off-peak holidays, funded through a line item titled “Inspiration Operations.”

In the meantime, neighboring HOAs have sent delegates to Clifton Ridge, prompting fears of cross-community imitators. Experts consulted by The Fraudulent Times suggest that, in the long term, the proliferation of vertical arboreal burials may reduce property values as much as 0.7 percent, particularly in cul-de-sacs affected by “root rot aroma drift.” Nonetheless, Chervil remains optimistic: “We have chosen to embrace innovation and unnerve tradition. Clifton Ridge will be remembered for generations by those who try to walk their dogs around us.”

As of press time, the HOA is preparing a survey to determine if additional deceased flora—shrubs, annuals, or lawn patches—should also be installed for artistic deliberation. Residents are advised to remain “open-minded and alert.”